Ale Llamas, Monica Naranjo and buying under the influence.

The world is not the same as it was when I was younger (in my twenties). Oh God it’s “so not” the same and I imagine that’s a good thing too.

Now in my forties a good friend of mine departed forever, others have disappeared, some stay close and some are always kind of present by my recurrent memories.

Like Ale Llamas, one of my dearest friends during that twenties decade. We were very tight during those important years and that friendship made me a stronger person, no matter how selfish I was in it in the end (I had said I was sorry and today I say it again).

I've never been good at communicating with those I see infrequently, it’s a horrible mistake that I want to fix -- I am as always -- a work in progress.

Then my mind starts wondering and heading back, reaching out. 

Again and again.

The other night I made the terrible mistake of browsing I-tunes after a couple of tequilas and I let my memories get the best of me -- and my credit card.

And it was only until this morning that I realized how far I took my shopping spree. As I put the shuffle on and started my run I couldn’t understand what Miguel Mateos, Gloria Trevi (!!!!!) Alex Syntek, Maná and Monica Naranajo (among many others) were doing in my music library.

Shit was I surprised! I must have spent hours buying all those tunes -- that as tacky as they are -- remind me of important passages of my life.

I can’t remember how many times Ale and I must’ve danced “Sólo se vive una Vez” and I do remember that it was always exhilarating, to say the least.

This morning I had to stop, sit and listen to the song. It even brought one stupid tear to my eyes. Memories can do that and nostalgia can trap us if we allow it to happen.

So I did. Get trapped for an instant. It made me smile too.

My communication did fail me at many times and friends became out of sight but never out of heart.

And I let people that I considered indispensable become momentary players in my life. It was wrong.

My story with Ale is a good one. We shared too many laughs and too many tears. This song – this horrendous song -- is for you.

Today Mónica Naranjo it's the one connection that brought back many good memories, it’s 11 am and I am still going through the archive…