Public classes are a horrible idea.

Today we had the public class at my daughter’s school.

That one-day during the academic year where parents get to witness their kids in action, going about their everyday school routine.

But in my case – just a small amount of action – it's more about exchanging stares with Juliana, because I get to witness how little attention she pays, how she chews her hair and day-dreams, thus not raising her hand desperate like all the other kids who want to show off to their parents.

It is in fact an opportunity to see me, Sofia, a lifetime ago.

And it pains me.

Juliana is an amazing little girl, sensitive, creative, curious, smart, she is everything except focused on school. Which of course we all foresee (that is parents and teachers) being a problem through “our” lives.

And I am ready, bring it on, but please no more public classes.

No need for reminders and no need to dig deeper into my childhood for it is there – haunting me – Yes, I used to be just like her.

The other day I asked her what worried her. She seems to have this worried look lately,

- “I can’t do cartwheels and all my friends at gym class can”

I told her it was fine because she just started gymnastics this year whereas the other girls started a couple of years ago.

But that didn’t make her feel any better,

- “Mom will you teach me?”

Hell no! (I thought).

- "Honey… I never learned how to do cart wheels”

At that point I remembered how it used to pain me to see Leny (the girl who knew how to do it all) do cartwheels at school, also swimming, gymnastics routines, volleyball and everything else that required good coordination.

Oh God was I bad.

I told her,

- “You are talented and you'll be very good at so many other things in life”

But she insisted,

- “I just want to be good at cartwheels”

Life can be a bit hellish for all of us.

In the other hand my son Diego is a kamikaze who just got expelled from full-time school and thrown into the 3-day-a week program because he requires way too much attention.

I went to his parent-teacher conference and I begged the teachers to let him continue going everyday.

They just begged back. They said a full week was a little too much.

"Take it easy teachers" I thought to myself, I do live with the little guy.

So that is that.

He's really good with the scooter and he has no fear at the playground.

But he continues speaking a language we don’t recognize and has no intention of getting rid of his diaper.

We all have our imperfections.

And then we have things that we are amazing at.

I wish I could do cartwheels, I really do, but now it’s too late.

I don’t need to fail all over again.

Might as well stay in safe ground.

Someday, I am sure my kids will understand why.