In Staten Island...

Those turkeys in Staten Island are out of control.

The State officials seem to be out of control too - and also some of the neighbors.

These turkeys are taking over, scaring people, climbing atop of cars, leaping over the home’s fences, destroying people’s gardens or camping in trees at these private homes. But the state has rejected the local’s plea to transfer the flocks to more rural counties - because officials fear, the birds might not adjust well after acclimating to a human habitat. 

So there you have it.
They will stick around.
Like the Sacred cows in India – except those cows, are actually sacred.
And those turkeys cannot be hunted either, they are protected with prescribed seasons and areas, none of which are within the city limits. 

This is of course none of my business since I live in another borough – but it never seizes to amaze me – how things like this always happen in NYC.
And If I where living in Staten Island, I guess my thinking would be “I have to live with the turkeys, the officials don’t”

Who are these officials from the Department of Environmental Conservation?
What is their thinking? Really, I would love to know.
Do they discuss the turkey matter while drinking coffee and donuts?
Or do they have more formal meetings with power point projections showing pie charts of the multiplying turkeys?

The latest given options for addressing the issue are:

Ignoring the creatures completely; educating residents about how to coexist with the birds (love this one); harvesting some of them for food to give to "a local food bank" or slaughtering all the birds and donating their meat.

But of course one crazy neighbor has begun his war to protect the turkey’s lives. And part of me agrees, the option of slaughtering the birds for food is inhumane but also - who would want to eat such turkeys? - they have been living the dirty urban life!

I’m just saying, it’s Christmas, and people eat a lot of turkey during the holiday season.

Me?

Like (most probably) the crazy neighbor, I think I’ll pass.

The officials?

I would love to know.